LOVE to you

Ellie, Feb 2008

FAITHuary

That George Michael song keeps running through my head:
"Ya gotta have Faith, Faith, Faith, Ya gotta have Faith, Faith Faith!"

Man, I don't know what it is about this February that has changed it into my FAITHuary.
It seems to have been a rough month! Nothing MAJOR, you know... just seems like I'm putting one foot in front of the other right now.... one step at a time! Haven't felt like blogging, yet missing your blogs. Tired, busy, stressed, happy, full, blessed. I know, I am an enigma.

Despite my heart, (oh me of many emotions!) (I tell Tom I'm "emotionally sophisticated"),
it has been a month full of fun and activity!

For example...Superbowl party at Tiff's house with our friends... The Cunninghams and... The Nerones...
Lotsa ice around to play with. (Global warming... where art thou?)
Ellie received lots of Valentines! Luke has a "valentine" named Emma and Kami has a real one but she won't let me post pictures of that! (Emma's mommy is very sick in the hospital - please lift her up in prayer!)

Ellie's best bud Brooke!
Basketball and more basketball and more basketball
Luke's team at the YMCA
And of course ORU games galore! (the home games are over now, whew!)
a great game of hide-and-seek! I just love playing with my kids!

On a sad note, Cosmo has been sick. We thought he was better and he was, but the improvement was due to a steroid injection that made him seem better but he wasn't all along. The kids said bye to him this morning. It was an awfully sad moment... he is being put to sleep this afternoon. Just trying to keep it together! On another truly heartbreaking note, please remember to Pray for Kate.

I can hear the birds chirping outside... spring is coming. Cosmo will be relived of his pain soon. Basketball season will be over for another year and God himself has His Hand on our lives. I am so thankful for His presence and power in my life.

He will get me through this FAITHuary and help me MARCH on!!

Bits and Pieces

*I have been asking myself lately when I used to fit blogging in?!! Holey Moley! This month I am lucky to find time to put on deodorant.

*Valentine's Day was lovely. Our little family had a Valentine's Breakfast, which was nice since our Valentine's evening consisted of the oh, so, romantic Valentine's Day Basketball Game. The best thing about the evening? 2 of my awesome friends keeping me company through an exciting/stressful basketball game.... AND.... ORU won! Love you too, honey- that's a great present any day of the year. (I did get flowers - below - and a very sweet card).

*Not that we had mac and cheese for our Valentine's Breakfast, but speaking of food, am I the only one who is amazed at how different Mac and Cheese seems the older my kids get? When they were little, one box of mac and cheese went on and on. It was like the fishes and loaves. Now, I stir up a pan of it and it looks like such a piddly little pile of pasta. It's just a strange feeling that I can't quite get over for some reason.

*Here is our energy-filled little boy at the beginning of his basketball game this past Saturday. At Upward games, they announce the names of the kids (Luuuuuuuuuuuuuuuke) and they run out and get all excited. Luke may get a little more excited than most. He has a lot of gusto.*All your comments on my last post really encouraged me, complete with the necessary round of tears. If you ever get that Loser Mom feeling yourself, take a look at all those comments. I completely intended to personally respond to every single one of them... they truly lifted me up!!! Thank you so much for your thoughts and encouragment. This is a better week. Plus I had a crazy friend who called me at 7:30 AM on Saturday just to make sure I wasn't missing our bball pictures. Ha! Nikki - I miss your Florida-living self.

*Oh, and the lesson? The bigness of God's grace and that I in my human condition need to extend that grace to all people. I need to quit looking at that speck in other's eyes when there is a log in my own. Cuz I was on the other end of that and it did not feel good.

*One thing I am so busy with right now (besides life in general) is being in charge of Teacher Appreciation Week for our school in April (220 people). The theme is JEE Faculty and Staff: YOU ROCK! We are incorporating a rock and roll theme and it is going to be so fun! Though right now it feels like a full time job. Having meetings, organizing activities, contacting people, getting donations, being creative and just thinking it all through. Woh!

* I sure miss reading your blogs too! I just haven't. been. able. to. :( I miss the bits and pieces that you share. You know me, always getting inspired by you! Miss you!

*Oh, and Elle Belle who is always taking pictures, grabbed my camera and took one of herself. I love the crumbs on her cheeks and how her freckles pop. So Ellie. I love that little girl. I love her to pieces.*Good night, my friends! Blog and non-blog! I know you are out there. XOXOXO.

All You Need Is Love

Sometimes, special days like Valentine's just kind of come and go. Between the box making, valentine signing and cookie baking, the day seems to slip too quickly into yesterday...like a perfect chocolate heart popped in the mouth and melted away.

We did lots this Valentine's Day and more, but for some reason, I had a revelation this year. Maybe just a moment of mental clarity. Whatever it was, it seemed to make all the little things more meaningful. It was like I had just had lasik surgery; the world was so clear.

I started really thinking. About the day. About Love. And it came to me that God is Love. Why it never really hit me like this I don't know. But Valentine's Day should be a day about Him. A day about Jesus, who is LOVE.

So, making a Valentine's box with Luke (a very cool, rolling, blue car box), become an act of love for my son, not something that took up the only extra 30 minutes I had in my evening. And getting those Valentine's signed and stapled and licked and bagged and organized, while tiring, became too a little prayer, for each tiny name printed. I'm not saying I didn't get tired, cuz I did. But it just felt different this year.

And let me tell you what happened next....I looked into the eyes of my Granny and I saw the Love of God there. I saw 97 Valentine's Days shining through. And when she handed the red, pink and white, heart-covered quilt over to Hallie (yeah for Hallie - she won the drawing! Boo for us - we didn't win it!), I saw that her EVERY DAY is the kind of day I had this Valentine's. For her body surely gets more tired and pained than mine. Her heart is surely weary of the cares of this world. But she sews one stitch after another because God loves her and she loves Him and she does it as an act of love for her children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. Simple stuff, I know. But it meant something to me.

Oh, and one more thing.... with Tom being out of town on Valentine's Day, I amazingly did not even feel sorry for myself, not one little bit. And then, that night, when I went to bed, there on my pillow, was a sealed, red envelope, just for me. And then the next morning, a purple one, on the magazine rack. And you're not going to believe this: but later that day, another one, a white one, tucked away in a drawer. Not bragging, just thankful for Love this year.

In the Spirit of St. Valentine

Valentine's Day is always the perfect time to think about those we love.... or at least have crushes on. Today, Luke's friend Bonnie was over before school, sitting with him at the bar while he ate breakfast. They talked and laughed like miniature grown-ups for a few minutes, and then Luke looked at me with true sincerity and said, "I think I'm going to kiss Bonnie." Bonnie grinned a great big banana grin. Luke never went for the kiss, but it was about the cutest moment I think I'll ever see in my entire life.