These Are a Few of My Favorite Things

Well, honestly, it's hard to think about my favorite things right now, when I have a hole in my heart the size of a pot of Granny's brown beans.

But as I watched granny lie there in her hospital bed today, with one foot on earth and one in heaven, I realized that she still has some favorite things. She is in a dream-like state, talking in words and phrases that obviously represent some things dear to her heart.

Here are a few of Granny's favorite things:

*Her dear dog Fred - at one point, we got to laughing that he must be more important to her than anyone, because she kept telling us to "let him in" or "let him out!"

*Cooking - she constantly talked about what she should get us or cook for us - "If you'll stay awhile, I'll put something on the stove for you" or "let's go cook something up!"

*Her family - almost everytime she opened her mouth, the name of one of her loved ones would pop out, like a Valentine. "Rex" "Judy" "Fred" One special moment was when she talked about my cousin's son Kyler... she went on for awhile about what a special little boy he is. If you could just have heard her say his name "Ky-ler" then you would know how she feels about him.

*Opening up her house for company - She always wanted to know who was coming through her door, whether a real or dreamed up person, she wanted to welcome them, whomever it was.

*God - As I prayed for her aloud she murmured lovingly "God" and "It is well."

Surprisingly, I didn't hear her say anything about sewing, but I still think she'll be sewing us quilts up in heaven. Maybe, though, God will have her in his kitchen. Probably so.

So in honor of Granny, here are a few of my favorite things about this Christmas:
Drinking hot chocolate and singing Christmas carols around a fire at Big Cedar Lodge.

The elf tuck in at Big Cedar Lodge. "Candy" the elf came for a bedtime story and gave out a stocking to each kiddo.

We had a Christamas tree in our cabin at Big Cedar. I love Christmas trees. And the smell of the pine that has been fresh and fragrant in our house this December.

The last moments we were able to spend with Granny over Christmas were priceless.

Ahhh, making Gingerbread houses is always such a treat.

We play Dirty Santa each Christmas Eve. The adults play a round and so do the kids. Here are the kids acting all nicey nice after they have stolen each others gifts several times.

Christmas morning excitment is still electric. Here is Luke with his Skateboarding Nutcracker that was sitting on top of his brand new skateboard.

Ellie got at least one thing off her list: a bow and arrow. She was thrilled.

Tom is gone for a lot of special occassions, but he is ALWAYS home on Christmas morning. That is one of my favorite things.

Getting together with family I only see once a year. This year's gathering was at our house!

Here are the "hat girls" Ellie and Aunt Billy

Cousins hanging out in the cul-de-sac!

When the dog bites, when the bee stings, when I'm feeling bad,

I simply remember my favorite things

and then I don't feel so bad....

The Rundown

12:01 AM ~ Cleaning up vomit is never a great way to start the day. ohhh nooo. especially when you are supposed to be "getting away" at Big Cedar Lodge. (Kim and I decided to take a little three day trip to break up the time with our husbands out of town til Christmas Eve.) The fun continued until 3AM as Luke coughed, sneezed, had a nightmare I was unable to wake him up from, ran a fever, threw up more, and yodeled. Yes, he yodeled in his sleep. That did give me a little smile. At 3AM, he calmed down enough to allow us to sleep, if fitfully. I started the day exhausted already.

7:45 AM ~ Waking up to the reality of the day was tough for me. I felt like I had a Lifetime movie playing in my head as I watched scenes of my Granny through all stages of my life. I saw Granny reach for the Hostess cupcakes on top of her refrigerator to give me as a five year old having a slumber party at her house. I saw her pulling potatoes and carrots from her garden she and my grandpa planted on our farm. I listened to her teaching me to quilt. I saw her smile a thousand times. All these are memories to treasure, but today they just hurt.

8:00 AM ~ Messages start coming in. Texts, phone calls (one from Louisiana!), Facebook

messages, emails, blog comments. I thanked God for digital communication today. All communication treasured, all helping me move forward. ThAnK yOu!!!

9:30 AM ~ Packed the car alone. Felt lonely for Tom and my mom and sister as I got everything together on a blustery morning in Missouri. I try not to complain how much I miss my husband, because you just kind of have to steel yourself to that, but there is a hole in my heart that can't be patched until he comes back to us.

10AM ~ I had nothing but time as I drove back home from Big Cedar, listening to Luke cough like a crazy man and think about my granny. Headache. At least there was no vomit. Just a whole lot of phlegm and snot and coughing. Did I mention the coughing? And Did I mention how good my kids were in the car? I think the personal 10 inch TV's had something to do with that, but still.

3PM ~ Finally, after what seemed an eternity of driving, I saw my granny at the hospital. I thought she would be unresponsive, but I found that she was no less amazing than any other time I've been around her lately. Though she obviously is growing painfully weaker with each moment, she greeted each grandchild with pure delight from her bed. Her left arm is broken, but with her right she reached up to touch each one's face, ending the conversation with a slurred "I looooovvvvveee youuuuuuuu." Her resolve to show love is stunning.

4:30PM ~ Picked up Wilson from the vet. Who doesn't feel a little better at the sight of a dog who thinks you are the best person ever.

5:30 PM ~ Brought my cousin's kids to the house so she could spend more time at the hospital with granny. She lives out of town and I know that it's been hard on her to be far away during this time. Yes, I wanted to be there tonight with everyone, but I'm really glad that Heather got a few more precious moments with our inspiration.

6:00 PM ~ Picked up burgers for all 5 kids. Luke hasn't eaten much today, but requested coleslaw. Just the smell of it makes me sick, but for Lukey I guess it's a healing food. Cause he ate all of it. And weirdly, he's better now.7:30 PM ~ Opened a slew a Christmas cards, just love em, each and everyone. Mine are being mailed tomorrow, really they are coming to a mailbox near you.

7:45 PM ~ Gasped when I saw a preview for this show on Nick Teen. Really? I. had. no. idea. TV off. Out comes the board games.
8:40 PM ~ Listened to my beloved Golden Eagles lose their game by a couple points. Ugh. Never a good way to end the day. Ever. I feel for my hubby, my bro-in-law, and the players. And the coaches wives. Ouch.
9:30 PM ~ Made a new ending to the day by reading Christmas books with the kids. They each picked out one. Though I could barely keep my eyes focused on the words, the kids settled into it and we even sang through "The Little Drummer Boy" together. I like this ending better.

11:42 PM ~ Not sure where that 2 hours and 12 minutes went, but that is the rundown. I am feeling run down but lifted up. I am reminded of Max Lucado's book Everyday Deserves a Chance. He points out the verse "This is the day that the Lord has made" refers to all days, not just the ones we liked. Sick days, sad days, losing days, and dying days. They are all still days that He has made, and I worship Him for it.

Giving it Up

As I make little ant tracks on this earth,

I create a concept of what my life should be like,

how God should work things out for me.

And when the river of my life encounters rapids and roaring waters,

and other events that frankly rail against all common sense,

it's easy for me to be taken aback: God why have you allowed this?

But I'm giving it up. I think it's in my best interest.

The God who made the ants and rivers and every layer of this richly detailed universe

is the God who does what He pleases. Yes, He is loving and gracious and kind.

And He sustains me daily. I can't possibly understand all his kindnesses toward me.

But, lest I forget, He is God. He Does as he Pleases.

Take Mary. I'm positive she was completely shocked and confused about the developments in her life. Not only did she embarrassingly turn up pregnant before she was married, she had to ride a donkey while very pregnant and give birth to a baby in a stable. It makes no sense. But I really believe she had given it up: "I am the Lord's servant... May it be to me as you have said." ~Luke 1:37

She could have kicked, she could've screamed. Instead she gave it up.

I notice this same response with many of God's chosen people:

When faced with talking to the king and risking her own life, Esther surrendered: "If I perish, I perish." She held on Loosely but Didn't Let Go.

When responding to Nebuchadnezzar, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego hotly retorted: "If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us from Your Majesty’s hand. But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up.” They definitely gave it up. I love those guys.

Take Jonah, however. We're studying him at church right now and being reminded how he held on to Jonah's will. He didn't feel like taking the trip to Nineveh and he really despised the Ninevites, so "Jonah ran away from the Lord." As we know, things got worse for Jonah. What really gets me about Jonah was that after he had finally obeyed God, he held on to his own bitter will. He waited outside the city of Ninevah, hoping to see calamity fall upon it. But when it didn't he was "greatly displeased and became angry [with God]." Jonah's final words of the book are "It would be better for me to die than to live." How sad. Give it up, dude. How different the book of Jonah could have been.

It sure is easy to see the err of Jonah's ways, but the irony is that I live my own life like Jonah. Questioning the things that happen in my life. Such as, I prayed to be a missionary (in college I really did surrender my life to mission work), but I'm living a very secular life married to a basketball coach. Huh? That makes no sense Lord. And as far as basketball goes, I would think it's in God's perfect and pleasing will that the ORU basketball team, who holds up the banner of Jesus, would win each and every basketball game we play!!! Ha. Not even close. It doesn't make sense. There are also numerous unbloggable things about my life that just don't make sense. And in the lives of many, many of my Christian friends.

I haven't dared to mention the number of those who loved God in the Bible and beyond who died awful deaths because of their profession of faith in Christ. Now that just does not jive with my idea of what God would do. Yeah, I'm having a hard time getting that, and in my human mind, maybe it's not possible to understand.

But with God's help I'm giving it up. God is God. He does as He pleases.

I think this attitude will be strengthened by a three keys:

*An understanding of my place, God is God; I am put here on earth as his humble servant, doing whatever it is he asks.

*An yearning for my real home, earth is temporary, heaven is forever.

*A belief in God's love enormous for me, and how in the end God's plan is perfect, even if that doesn't mean perfect as we understand it.

I can't think of a better thing to give God for Christmas than my stubborn will which wants my own way. I want to give him my heart that says, "I trust You, I love You and I submit to You, even when things don't make sense."

What Ellie Wants For Christmas, 2010

A tarp

A realistic train set

Antique pocket knives

A round trip airplane ticket to Hong Kong (where her Uncle Zach lives)

A bow and arrow

A new puppy

A rifle

A chemistry set

A machete

Needless to say, Ellie is a bit difficult to shop for this year. I just can't picture a tarp under the Christmas tree or a machete for that matter. If you don't know her well, you may be a bit worried about her; if you do know her, you know that Ellie is Ellie and nobody else but Ellie.

Encouraging Ida

Granny loves the holidays, but unfortunately, she's spending this one stuck in a wheelchair living in the nursing home. So we thought we'd spice things up for her a little bit. You would have thought we had brought in a live 24-foot Douglas fir like the one in Washington, D.C.......she was so pleased with the little, silvery, tinselly thing. She was in good spirits on this day.

One night last week, I went by to see her around 7 P.M. She was wearing her red laced gown and all tucked in under 3 layers of covers (now I know why I love covers so) with the lights down low. She says to wake her up when she's asleep "I want you to wake me up!" she insists sweetly. "It breaks the monotony." So woke her up I did, and I don't know if was the heaviness of night that or the dream-like state of sleep that had her baring a soul a little more freely to me. She talked of what ifs (what if that darn swivel chair hadn't taken me down), and she affirmed God's protection over her (it didn't even hurt! God was right there with me.) She expressed her motherly worries (how's your Uncle Rex [her son] doing) and then spoke of her frustration at her current situation (I just want to be home). I wasn't sure what home she was talking about, her earthly one or heavenly one, but I just felt my heart twist up and I said, "Granny, God has left you about this old earth for some reason. He has a little more work for you to do here." She looked at me with a tiny twinkle in her eye. "You think so?" she wondered aloud.... "I know so, Granny!" I replied. "In fact," I explained, "you are already doing God's work, just being here in this nursing home and living so faithfully with your eyes on Jesus." I told her that several of my friends have been inspired by her over the years and especially lately. (I know this, friends, because you've told me!). "Really?" she questioned. "Yes, granny." I told her I share with my friends her love for God, her fear of nothing but him, the way she is always looking for God to return to earth, in anticipation of meeting Jesus each and every day of her life. She said, "Well, that just makes it worth it, then doesn't it," she whispered before she drifted off in sleep.

If my granny has touched you in any way, if you have seen her faith shine, I'd ask you to consider taking a moment and telling her so. I'd love you to send her a card to the nursing home. I know that many of you have never met her, but felt you have from hearing me talk about her incessantly. :) The words from you would confirm to her that her faithful walk has touched hearts along the way, even those she doesn't even know. It would make her days there a little softer. Here is her contact info:

Park's Edge Nursing Center
Attn: Ida Reynolds
5115 East 51st Street
Tulsa, OK 74135-7430

A Christmas Carol - 2009

Does anyone sing "Come on Ring Those Bells" anymore?

I learned the Christmas carol in school as a kid and sang it at the top of my lungs.

I hope it will make a comeback if you haven't heard it;

it's such a fun song with a message!

Come sing along with us now... and enjoy the images of our Christmas 2009.

This is What a White Christmas Looks Like

The Blizzard of 2009. A mere dusting for those who live even 100 miles north of us, but a gargantuan "weather event" for meterologists around here and us snow rookies. It was indeed a white Christmas... and here is what we saw: Snow starting to accumlate on Granny's porch on Christmas Eve.
Excitement on the faces of all the kids! It's SnOwInG!
Big winter coats and snow boots!

Terrible visibility during the harrowing ride home. Would love to say I wasn't a backseat driver, but oh no, that didn't happen. I'm sure it didn't help Tom's sense of calm for me to squeal out: "slow down!" "watch out!" "I'm too young to die!!" (j/k on the last one). Cars and trucks in the ditch (look carefully and you will see this pick up truck nose down).

More cars in the ditch on Christmas morning.

And more cars abandoned on the side of the road while driving out to Nana and Papas.

Snow plows.

It was like a car graveyard.

More snowplows.

Papa on his 4-wheeler out on the farm.

Snowball fights.

Rides in the snow (Tom and Maggie)

A dusting of snow on a beauty.

A warm and toasty friendship.

Fun in the white stuff!

The making of snowangels.

A perfect Snowangel!

Big SmilesHappy FacesSledding in the park with Uncle Jon. Tom and Ellie!

May your days be merry and bright, and may all your Christmases be white.