Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Disappointment

He stands imposingly in the doorway.
Broad shouldered, darkly staring me down.
Accusing. Glaring. Denouncing.


I steal a look at him and run weakly to my hiding spot,
like an injured rabbit.

Where my eyes grow bloodshot hot
and my heart red heavy.

Foolish. Scared. Embarrassed.


It seems impossible to face him.
To go up against him nose to nose.
Confident. Empowered. Believing.


I would rather not take the risk.
And turn inward.

Quiet. Paralyzed. Numb.


Or I would rather fight him like a crazy woman.

Swing my fist into his jaw, hair flying insanely.

Wild. Angry. Hurt.


Instead.

I will pick myself up.
I will walk calmly towards him.
I will give him a steel look in the eye.

Mouth set, I will say firmly,
"Move over. I am coming through."

Faith-filled. Moving forward. Expecting God's best.

6 Wonderful Responses:

Kathleen said...

Wow...so powerful! I THINK this is Disappointment personified?? Am I right? If it is, I'm sorry you have experienced it; I can only assume--from the emotion of the words--it was recently. I'm glad you're out with both fists swingin'!

Shannon said...

He's a tough opponent but sounds like you (and Him) have it handled. Blessings, Annie.

momof4kr said...

STUNNING description of one of life's least favorite experiences.

And oh yea you will tell it to "move on over". God's got WAY bigger plans in store!

Whitney said...

Beautifully put Annie! That described how I've felt all week. I hope God's grace is sustaining you as you walk past dissapointment.

Anonymous said...

I agree that God has bigger plans in mind. Wait and see. Mom

Rena said...

OH WOW! I missed this post but truly needed it this morning!

That's good. NO, that's AWESOME, POWERFUL!

Gonna' try to quit swinging my fists. :)

Yesterday's phone conversation was such a blessing! Now when I look at your pictures, I can also hear your voice.

Only the pictures in mind of you right now are those fists swinging.