Sunday, July 13, 2008

Panty Power

Why such a silly title?

I am trying my darndest to laugh at myself. I lecture my kids all the time on being easygoing and laid back and learning to laugh when something unexpected/embarrassing/upsetting happens to them publicly. Not to let anyone see them crumble. To take it lightly.

That's what I'm trying to do.

Otherwise, I could have named this post something different, like

"Whyyyyyy Meeeeeeeeeee?"
"I Will Never Step Foot in That Place Again"
"They Will Never Let Me Back in That Place Again"
"Everyone Thinks I'm Weird"
"I'm a Loser"
or
"I Have Got Some Serious Underwear Issues"

But before I tell you today's incident, I feel I must back up a couple months and share a most embarrassing moment in May. I took the time to get ready and got dressed into an exquisite black dress with a silken underlay, topped off with a sheer organza. Not dressing like this really often, I felt quite graceful as I walked Luke into his classroom, chatted with moms, ran an errand at Petco and made a big shopping trip to Walmart. About 15 minutes after I arrived at Wal-Mart, a young woman with a nosering stopped me and said, "Ma'am, I know I don't know you but..... (long pause) your dress is tucked up into your underwear in back." I will go no further, to spare you from the depth of my horror as I retraced my steps and exactly who all had seen my lovely big bottom hanging out.

But, I reasoned, this was just a one time thing. Everybody makes mistakes. I will be A LOT more careful.

So, tonight, I went to a Biblical Discipline Coffee Talk at Fellowship Bible. This is a church we've been visiting for awhile, and I thought I'd go maybe learn something and try to meet a few new people, make a couple new friends. It's not real easy when everyone seems to already know each other, but I thought, I'm not going to get anywhere unless I make the effort. So, I went. And sat in the first row. And walked around and got a water and got some Hershey's kisses and took a phone call in the hallway and then left early, right in front of the room of 50. Only to find out that my new brown pants have three inch rip right down my left bun, exposing my whiter than white grannish panties. (I have NO idea how it got there!) I guess the only blessing in the deal was that I wasn't wearing something garish or even nothing at all! Imagine the bare bun hanging out of the ripped pants. Oh, what a nightmare.

But I am laughing. Can't you hear me?

2 Wonderful Responses:

ourgoldenapples said...

Well that's one way to meet new people! Very funny stuff. :)

Now, you could have been wearing one of those lovelies that is essentially made of three strings. I had one of those hanging on a guest shower knob in a guest bathroom once. I was pregnant and could no longer handle it -- flinging them to that hidden location for instant relief. Of course, it was so hidden that I forgot they were there, and then allowed my husband's business partner to utilize THAT shower. The poor guy. That's horrification! Neither one of us ever said a word. :)

Giving a now always wearing Granny Underwear shout out...

Anne said...

Mama Knucker Hatch - Ha Ha! Glad to know that I'm not the only one who has "those" moments!!!